Dr. Banjara

I think this story has taken the longest for me to write; almost 38 years!

It’s because I always used to see him and never had the time to talk to him or rather never had the reason to. But, today, I’d one. Everyone must have seen him, at least once in a lifetime. Yes, these are the doctor who travels in their desi-vanity-van-cum-clinic all around the country. Got it?

शीघ्र पतन, पतली नाडी, स्वप्ना दोष, गुप्तरोग, मदुमेह, गैस, पीलिया, मर्दानी कुम्जोरी…नाडी दिखने का सिर्फ़ २० रुपैय |

Got it now? This was going on in a loop in his van as I passed by and finally, decided to talk to one of them today and this story will rock you.

I started by reading what was written on is desi-vanity-van-cum-clinic and as he saw me, I immediately asked for an appointment. Strangely, there was a patient inside and he asked me whether I’ve any masculine problem.

No, no. I just want to meet you.

This made him quite suspicious but he agreed and I, for the first time in my life, entered in desi-vanity-van-cum-clinic thing. Inside was full of jadi-booti brought from all over the country. I started by asking him where was he from and what made him live this life. He explained to me that this is their ancestral business and they form a community called Banjara from Rajasthan and they enjoy this work as it has got good money and they can travel all around the country and sometimes outside, like Nepal.

He told me that there are so many youngsters who come to him for sexual consultancy and medicine — for sexual enhancements.

People love sexy medicines.

That clearly shows that so many young men are mad after medicines and give him a good deal, not only in cities but in villages too.

I asked him whether they pay the parking charges, to which he said that he gives medicines to a policeman for free and they are quite happy with the results and don’t charge him anything. He then showed me all the herbs and their medicinal qualities.

He boasted that he can check the vein and tell the disease if any. So, I told them to check my vein. First, he said that I should keep Rupees 20 near the photo frame of his favorite Hindu God.

I told him that we’re friends now and is it good to give money to a friend? He immediately realized his folly and started analyzing my vein. After a few psychic gestures, he told me that I’ve too much heat in me.

Reason for my heat?

You must have done many wrong things in life!?


Wrong women?

No! What do you mean wrong women, I’m with the right one.

He started giving me all bullshit reasons but I kept on denying most of them. But it was good and he suggested taking some herbs for the cure.

The dialog was wonderful and before I could ask him to take his photo, he asked whether he could take a photograph of me. He clicked a wonderful photograph and then lastly, he wanted to see what I will do with his story.

I showed him my blog and explained to him that I put forward stories of wonderful people to the world and they read about these wonderful people through me, thus I’m a bridge to connect two worlds.

We said our final goodbyes and can’t forget his words.

Like Hindustani, Rajasthani, I’m Dr. Banjara Caravani. Remember me!

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